Thursday, October 27, 2005

A.A.A.D.D.

Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D. ->
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is> how it manifests:>>
I decide to water my garden.

As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide my car needs washing.

As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.

But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only 1 check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need to be watered.

I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:

----the car isn't washed
----the bills aren't paid,
----there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter,
----the flowers don't have enough water,
----there is still only 1 check in my check book,
----I can't find the remote,
----I can't find my glasses,
----and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you? Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember to whom it has been sent.

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!

GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL. LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC.

P.S. I just remembered, I LEFT THE WATER RUNNING IN THE DRIVEWAY!!!!!!!!!

When I came home from work this evening...this was in my email and I cracked up. Thought this was a great way to share it.

Oh yeah.....I'm feeling tons better thanks to the sinus meds I picked up on my way to work. Now that it's 12:20 am I'm going to bed.

4 Comments:

Blogger Kodijack said...

After the second line the whole time I was thinking (I am a conservationist)...did she turn off the water? I don't remember her turning off the water. So I am not suffering, yet.

2:27 AM  
Blogger steelcowboy said...

Hey, who'se writing 'bout me? ;)

6:54 AM  
Blogger JMS said...

I laughed the entire time I read this! This is SOOOO me and I'm only 30! I'm in major trouble!

6:55 AM  
Blogger gloria jean said...

hilarious.. but too true!

7:31 PM  

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